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BLUE GENES

by jamie says...

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1.
A Reason 05:57
Took a walk They said I’d find a reason Took some pills So I could find a reason Talked a lot To try and find a reason But I’m a hopeless kid I can’t sort out a thing I wish you were the one I wish you were reason Elevate Doctor said It’s possible Turned to him Then I said Invincible Then she said Don’t be sad That’s no good But I’m a hopeless kid I can’t sort out a thing I wish you were the one I wish you were reason Took a walk Talked a lot Took some pills Doctor said Then she said So good Don’t be sad Beautiful Wish I was Wish I could etc
2.
Give me my anaesthetic! Might I fall out of the sky Like a mystery sombrero And catch the public eye How on earth did I get there? What did I forget to write? My body touched the ground Without a scream or a cry Only a lust A fascination A suicide fantasy Feeding from my degeneration My skin’s starting to crawl Up on the whim A conscience caving in Up on the whim A conscience caving in Gazing up at uniform prison windows Flat-pack apartments built from luxury lego Gonna floor my motorcycle Crash my speeding car Need a break from this existence Want to be reborn on mars But it’s a life Born out of fiction A celluloid imposition Hard-back second edition My skin’s starting to crawl Up on the whim A conscience caving in Up on the whim A conscience caving in Do do do do do do do do do do…
3.
Jody Told Me 01:57
Jody told me I’m not cut out to be The singer-songwriter An A-list celebrity ‘Cause I can’t hit the high notes And I sure can’t reach the low But I always seem to think that I’m the face of rock and roll Jody told me I’m such and imbecile How can someone so oblivious Be such a know-it-all I’m pedantic and pompous Arrogant with spite Mean treating and conceited Like a spoilt little brat Jody I don’t care what you say Jean thinks my cheeks are rosy And that I’m smart, polite and brave Jody I don’t care what you say ‘Cause practice makes perfect So I’ll practice everyday
4.
Numb 03:08
So I’ve been told I'm too old before my time So I’ve been told I'm too old before my time Numb You feel numb with loving arms around you (Arms around you) Numb You feel numb with loving arms around you (Arms around you) Numb You feel numb Goodbye human emotion So long You feel numb with loving arms around you Arms around you (repeat all of above) Numb You feel numb with loving arms around you (Arms around you) (x4) Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh Ooh ooh
5.
A bitter breeze through wind swept feet The strangled tone of passing sirens Gravel spitting at the pavement Trains rolling along the steel Made you duck out for a moment Scared to move Air raid crouching Red arrows flying Tarmac melting Every little trivial uncertainty And every minor unforseeable casualty Creeps its way in And runs amok ‘Have the good times while you’re young’ That’s easier said than done Whilst the rain comes down and chills you Whilst you forget others around you Whilst you remain a sombre, sulking Self absorbed, Sullen waste of space Waiting on a cure Why does it make it worse when you try to fight it? It fights right back at you You know it makes it worse when you try to hide it It busts its way through Exposes you
6.
So Easy 03:30
It’s so easy To think that you’re the one So insistent on doing right Far too insecure in advance It’s so easy To apologize for yourself ‘Cause nobody likes a misery No one wants to hear about ‘you and me’ Sit on your own and talk to your crystal ball I’m a little scared But I’m mostly rue So my heart is bruised from holding my breath too long And that’s what it amounts to The silver screen and the Stanley blade Don’t hold your breath song long again Waiting for that shock to start the beat ‘Cause you’ll always turn out tertiary Sit on your own and talk to your crystal ball I’m a little scared But I’m mostly rue And that’s all that it amounts to It’s so easy To let somebody down And to wish that you weren’t around To see them there so let down with you Do you think I could make my wish come true Grant me my wish and kiss me twice Don’t hold your breath so long again Waiting for that shock to start the beat ‘Cause you’ll always turn out tertiary And that’s all that it amounts to The silver screen and the stanley blade And all of my plans and my hopeless mistakes It’s so easy pulling the pin from the hand grenade It’s so easy
7.
My mind Just won’t let me be Just won’t let me be Just won’t let me be Lord I cannot stand This anxiety This anxiety This anxiety Thoughts conducting Like a dynamo A never waning Ruminating Endless life retracing low Rushes growing in my chest, up my neck Legs are weak, short of breath, feeling sick Stomach churning, feel like I’ll choke Joints are aching, lump in my throat Got a fear biting at my spine Feel so dizzy, feel over tired Can’t sit still, don’t know what I’ll do Blood drains from my face and I pace round the room Thoughts conducting Like a dynamo A never waning Ruminating Endless life retracing low
8.
9.
Mother 03:09
You answer me with silence You answer with dismissal of my questions You speak by leaving the room You won’t hear my frustration You only see the clutter in the kitchen And the rising damp coming through Mother don’t make me feel I’ve no support ‘Cause I need your love, I need to be a son Reach out While half of me went missing You were in the company of television Sipping your camomile Hazy on a California film set And though you heard me sighing You had to cook a meal and do the shopping And hang the clothes on the line Mother I know I have to help myself But I need you there at those times that I can’t Reach out You kept at such a distance Private and forthcoming with reluctance Holidays falling short Arguments in such a heated climate I heard the old man laughing You were standing in the hallway cursing This residence far from home ***** I crawled under a dream You stood there immortal Majestic A halo provided by the moonlight Cast a show of strength Over a shadow of a doubt
10.
Blue Genes 03:23
Somewhere from my heart Flows a life turning to blue A sadness and resentment Resides inside of me If I could do things your way There’s no doubt that I would I’d try to do things your way If it did me any good Somewhere from my heart Flows a life turning to blue The generation patchwork Had been worn right through I fell into the gene pool And I sank to the floor I’d poisoned it all I was upside down and back to front Head over heels, stuck in the mud (these blue genes I have I plead to have not) It’s painstaking to think it That this is me and that’s who I’ll be These blue genes will continue To exist as part of me It’s some small consolation To know that life is short It’s transient and fleeting It’s hard to find the point I don’t want your eggs I don’t want mine ‘Cause these blue Genes just might show up down the line
11.
Static 02:47
She’s got me going out She’s making me wake up She’s bringing breakfast to bed And her steaming hot tea pot She let’s me share her wine She’s giving me her shade She’s giving me her static Yeah she’s helping me to change Oh I feel the light from clean blue skies Oh I feel her warmth, her charge inside She’s running a warm bath She’s making me so clean She’s wearing subtle perfume She’s applying steroid cream So close to being one She’s weezing out my name We could drive out to the seaside We could jump aboard a plane Oh I feel the light from clean blue skies Oh I feel her warmth, her charge inside Oh I feel the light from clean blue skies Oh I feel her warmth, her charge inside I feel her every move God knows it ain’t a sin She’s giving me her static Yeah she’s made my life begin
12.
Circa 1983 04:38
Somewhere in a former life I would have shot my mother Circa 1983 when I would be conceived Somewhere in a former life I would have shot my father Circa 1983 when I formed my character genes So if I pray to you dear lord Will you cure my soul? Jesus be my savior And I will be your son If I pray to you dear lord Will you cure my soul? Jesus be my hitman And you can shoot my gun “Don’t scorn your flesh dear You might not speak again dear” I’m not much of a nurse dear So feed me to the pigs Just as tragic heroes And players are to be You would find me a grave man Circa 1983 Frying free range eggs for my tea Just another salmonella Sunday (Repeat all of above) Cir-ca (x10) Cir… Circa 1983 (x4) So if I pray to you dear lord Will you cure my soul? Jesus be my savior And I will be your son If I pray to you dear lord Will you cure my soul? Jesus be my hitman And you can shoot my gun “Don’t scorn your flesh dear You might not speak again dear” I’m not much of a nurse dear So feed me to the pigs Just as tragic heroes And players are to be You would find me a grave man Circa 1983
13.
Sold 04:39
You’d like to meet someone Who doesn’t treat you like an endless chore ‘Cause you don’t want a fight Or any trouble every time you call You’d like to have a friend Someone that doesn’t try to take you on Or try to hold you down Or try to turn a simple question round Don’t cry because you sold yourself this time You’d like to meet someone Who doesn’t ask for something in return You’d like to feel secure And have importance in somebody’s world Drunken and floundering You reached out for a helping hand A grip to lead you home A substitute to occupy your bed Don’t cry because you sold yourself this time So you tried to play the field But there’s no love to find that’s lasting Just a one night stand Which makes you feel obscene So you close your eyes And let hot water run Over your arms, Legs A swan-song You’d like to meet someone Someone who doesn’t treat you like a bore You’d like to meet someone Someone who doesn’t make you feel ignored You’d like to meet someone Someone who holds you like you’re something more You’d like to meet someone Someone who gives you something at all Don’t cry because you sold yourself this time
14.
Dissociation 07:05
This isn’t my body These aren’t my own thoughts These are not my movements That’s not my reflection This view point is alien That’s not my position Make it go away Am I being erased yet? I’m so sure that I’m not alive I’m so sure I’m waiting to die Lost in time Lost in mind In disguise This isn’t true colour These aren’t my own visions These can’t be my reactions Is this a construction? These are not my perceptions I can’t feel these sensations Make it go away Am I being erased yet? I’m so sure that I’m not alive I’m so sure I’m waiting to die Lost in time Lost in mind In disguise You don’t know you’ve been born kid… This isn’t my body These aren’t my own thoughts These are not my movements That’s not my reflection This view point is alien That’s not my position Make it go away Am I being erased yet? Am I being erased yet? Am I being erased yet?

about

Buy CD here www.discogs.com/sell/item/346807157

Pieced together over a nauseatingly long period of time between June '07 and June '10. Recorded for the most part at Seamus Wong, High St, Leicester. Engineered by Sam Walker. Written, performed, mixed and produced by Kyle Hill. Justine Sautjeau provides backing vocals on tracks 2, 4, 6, 12, 13 and 14. Keyboard on track 10 by James "Parky" Parkinson. Sam and Parky provide shouting on tracks 8 and 10. Jim Jones and Peoples Temple appear on track 8 courtesy of The Jonestown Institute. Mastered by John Meredith at Arm Your Ears. Cover photo of Kyle taken by Andrew Brooks. Artwork by Kyle. Thanks to Lawrence Dawson, Clive Summerton, Paul Wong and Dave Dixey. Play it loud!

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released May 16, 2011

written, performed, mixed and produced by Kyle Hill

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jamie says... London, UK

jamie says... was the solo project of Kyle Hill. He released two albums (Autumn Sun & Blue Genes) and the 7" singles Machine & Down To The Debauchuary.

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